


My brother, the star man

by meikahidenori



Series: Thunderbirds are go AU [3]
Category: thunderbirds are go
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-27
Updated: 2016-06-27
Packaged: 2018-07-18 12:13:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7314739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meikahidenori/pseuds/meikahidenori
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Virigl and his thoughts about his brother John while he stays with his brother in Florida</p>
            </blockquote>





	My brother, the star man

**Author's Note:**

> PRE - Internationl Rescue fiction. I like to write them for fun :D  
> (character's ages for this, Virgil 18- just turned, John 19/going on 20, Scott 21 (as he turns 22 in April the next year and this is set roughly around september/october before John's birthday and Alan 11 - give me time to fix that in the fiction, been trying to correct my age descrepency between fictions)
> 
> sorry if this jumps around a fair bit, I lost the fiction at one point and had to do a major retrevial which caused me to loose the ending i originally had planned, but i'm alot happyier with this one. sorry if it doesn't makes sense, it was more or less a waffle fiction. (waffle - one where you just write and forget to contol yourself)
> 
> MAJOR EDIT: when I was originally typing this file, I was sending it to a freind on skype to read so some stuff might have duplicated or not been picked up gramically in the spellchecker. When I tried to copy the file to a new open office file it cruahed and I had to recover all the text off that skype conversation. now open office has sadly updated and has deleted all my dictionaries which is more than just midly annoying as I can no longer use the program. I posted this up thinking 'HORRAY! RESCUED!' and didn't think much of it till a friend messaged me and laughed that i had goofed up while posting it. so I am back again, editing :D good thing I enjoyed this fiction as I don't mind reading it thousands of times till I get it right!

He needed some inspiration. Under his university workload he had become creatively stagnant and was dying for a challenge to re-spark his imagination again. Drawing didn't work, doing sculptures out of leftover machine parts from his practical engineering work didn't seem to do it, he was starting to get a little desperate. He needed something new to do.

At least once a week he got a phone call from his two older brothers and his two younger siblings, though not always on the same night, just to see how he was going with his studies. Scott's talks were always short and sweet and to the point, phone calls from US Air-force bases were always monitored for security and kept on a timer to prevent personnel from giving away the base's locations and other information Scott thought was a lot of rubbish.

Gordon's were usually along the lines of general chatter, because he missed having Virgil around to be a goofball with and usually had some new prank he had pulled on Alan and subsequently Alan was always jumping in on the same line begging for Virgil to come home. It was normal from the youngest, as Virgil had found out from both Scott and John that he begged them as well to hurry up and come home for the holidays every time he got the chance. Virgil thought it was funny how much the little guy missed them.

Currently, he was on the phone to John who was calling from his shared apartment near Cape Kennedy. They were usually late at night from his brother's end due to John trying to avoid having the only time he got with his brother on the line interrupted by the idiots he lived with. Once, Virgil swore he could hear a wild party in the background, but after about an hour has suspected it might have been something else as occasionally his brother went red in the face from some of the sounds coming from one of the other rooms. Virgil found it amusing that John put up with it, but wasn't too surprised as he knew his brother missed the noise of his own siblings when he was away from home, a house with four other brothers was never quiet or dull.

For a change, there wasn't any loud music in the background and his brother looked rather happy to finally have peace and quiet so he could enjoy having a proper chat.

“You look burned out Virgil, are you sure everything is going along ok?”

“Burned out isn't the word, John.” Virgil admitted with a heavy shrug. “I feel drained. I haven’t felt able to relax in months, even in my usual ways.”

“No time to paint huh?”

“Well, yes and no. More like after staring at technical diagrams, drawing technical diagrams, learning advanced mechanics and electrical robotics has sort of drained the creativity out of it.” Virgil scratched his head. On the other side of the video phone, his older brother looked a little concerned.

“Hey, how about you come up here and stay for the weekend?” John asked, with a hint of a smile.

“Won't your house mates mind?”

“Not likely. I'm having to look for new ones. It's dead quiet around here since they moved out last week.” Ah, so that's why it's so quiet over the phone Virgil realised. 

“Both of them?”

John nodded. “Nigel moved out with his new girlfriend and Vanessa's gone backpacking around the world because her job gave her the heave-ho and she had been hanging around here for the past month struggling to find work. In a way I’m glad they're gone, no more picking up their trash to find  my own stuff in this place... but I also do however miss the noise.”

“Since when do you clean up anything?”

“I know right? I have no idea what's wrong with me. Don't tell Grandma otherwise she'd make me clean my room over the holidays next time we are home. But I’m not joking about the lack of noise. Ok, sure Nigel bringing home random girls he met at the local bar where he worked was annoying, but wouldn't have been much different if we all grew up like normal people who didn't live isolated on an island most of our lives.” John seemed to smile which in turn made Virgil relax a little more. Truth be told, Virgil's dorm companions could have been more lively, but instead he was trapped sharing a place with the most boring people on the planet.

“You sure your not too busy at NASA to put up with me for two days?” Virgil asked.

John shook his head. “They just finished up a test flight of a new experimental rocket on Thursday so for now I’m not doing very much.” he visibly yawned and stretched. “Won't be for at least a week I think, since I’m not required on the project anymore until it's maiden voyage.”

“Really?” Virgil sounded interested.

“To dad's old moon base and back, basic simple stuff, If it makes it that far. They are not very creative with their test paths.” John seemed to find it amusing. “Look, pack a change of clothes, some of your art stuff and I'll pick you up tomorrow afternoon after your last lecture. Make sure it can fit into a back pack, otherwise it won't be able to fit.”

“Won't be able to fit? How small is your car?” Virgil then hesitated. “Aren’t you going to pick me up from the airport in a taxi?

John laughed. “I don't have a car Virgil. I ride a motorbike. Don't tell Gordon otherwise he's going to want one too. I heard what he did to dad's friends butler when he was taken out for a driving lesson, and I'd hate to think what he'd be like on a motorcycle.”

“You still haven’t answered how you're going to travel all that way to Denver in less than a day.”

“The new sky pass Virgil. They finished building it a few years ago, it turns the one day journey by road into a few hours drive. It's only designed for light passenger vehicles because of the weight limits the road can handle. I guess since you haven’t needed to drive that far you haven’t noticed all these weird little motor ways that just cut right across and go direct into the cities.

“Fair enough.” Virgil seemed satisfied with the answer. He has suspected John had thought about this prior to asking him to visit anyway, but it was nice to know for his own curiosity. “My last lecture finishes just after one thirty in the afternoon, so I'll meet you out front of the university campus.”

“No worries, Virgil. See you then.”

Virgil hung up the video phone and leaned back on his bunk and stared at the ceiling. Hopefully spending time with John would get him out of his creative rut. He knew he could sure so with sometime away from his studies, it wasn't as if he had to concentrate on producing a thesis or anything since all his work was more hands on and could only really be done in the classrooms.

Friday afternoon couldn't have come fast enough. Virgil's last lecture was on thermodynamics and engineering in regards to light engine aircraft had been more or less a snoozefest, but he knew there was a high chance of failure if he didn't waste time taking notes for a test that would be down the line in the near future. He was relived to get out of there and hurried down to the front of the building, where he noticed a small crowd outside the front who seemed to be gawking at something.

As he got closer he could see what it was they were all staring at. Some guy was standing a little way away near a ancient, but well looked after antique of a motorbike, talking away with a student Virgil knew from one of his mechanics classes. Antique in the way that it still had two wheels still on terra-firma, as most motorbikes made after 2048 were all wheel-less and hovered above the ground. A lot of cars did to, with the exception of luxury makes like Ferrari and the British Roll Royce. It took a few more minutes for him to realise the driver had spotted him and was waving. Surely that can't...

“Virgil! Over here!”

Virgil had to shake himself out of his stunned state before heading over toward his brother, whom he had failed to recognise on sight for the first time in his life. It had only been the night before they last spoke, but now it seems he didn't know the complete stranger in front of him. For the first time, Virgil was on the receiving end of a brotherly hug from his tallest sibling, because Virgil still couldn't get the idea out of his head that John looked like like he escaped from some old 90's action movie.

Styles had really not changed much for motorcyclists in the clothing department other than becoming more sleeker and breathable and this made his brother look like a really skinny stork. He seemed oblivious to all the stares he was getting, especially those of the female persuasion who liked a bad boy on a bike, But then John was only trying to focus on his brother, an old habbit he had when dealing with large groups of people.

“You expect me to get on the back of that death trap on wheels?” Virgil gave his brother a worried look.

“I rode it all the way here didn't I?” his brother grinned. “I distinctly remember two younger siblings who used to tell me I was stuffer than a starched shirt, telling me I should live a little.”

“But that's practically an antique! It's older than dad!” Virgil exclaimed.

“No, dad is still older than it by maybe twelve or so years.. look what's your problem and why are you acting all weird about it?”

“Oh I uh... you know how it is...” Virgil looked embarrassed. “You don't usually picture your older, nerdier brother doing something so cool as riding a motorbike older than he is.”

John seemed to think about it. “Nope, can't imagine. Mostly because I’m not one iota envious of Scott. Being sent out to do some service for another country encase there will be another world war doesn't sound like something that would interest me. There hasn't been a global conflict for a long time and I’m mighty grateful of that. However I still can't quite understand why we need a military when we have a global defence force now which are like a giant form of international police. Hasn't anyone heard of the saying, 'those who seek war, prepare for war'? Or is that just me?”

Virgil gave John another hug, this time with a great deal more enthusiasm. “Damn I missed you and your utter terrible logic.”

“Come on, we better get going.” John patted his brother on the back for him to let go. “Want to get to Knoxville at least by dinnertime so we can take a break before going the rest of the way.”

“Sounds good to me.” Virgil grinned as he let his brother go. “Oh by the way, I don't have any more lectures till Wednesday, If you still have the time off, I could stay until the Tuesday and maybe fly back.”

“Sounds like an idea, Virgil. 'Cept maybe I’ll bike us back on the Tuesday instead, that way we have a whole day to detour and do fun stuff.”

“Deal.” Virgil thought to himself that if this all goes well, maybe he'd ask to visit John on his birthday next month, as John had a tendency to never miss any of theirs but completely forget about his own.

John handed Virgil a jacket and helmet. “You're going to need these.”

Virgil looked at the jacket. “You sure it's going to fit? Looks tight.”

“Just put it on Virgil.” John rolled his eyes. “I'm not Gordon, I know clothes need to fit other people than myself.”

Virgil slipped the jacket on and it fitted snugly like a nice pair of gloves. He had to hand it to his brother, John had a tendency to know more about them than they did about him. Stopping at Knoxville was the icing on the cake as a lot of Virgil's favourite musicians came from there. Clearly his brother had missed him since the last time they got to hang out and was trying to make up for it by doing something with him he liked.

Most of the ride towards Knoxville was pretty a cruise, the new skyway pretty free of large and heavy traffic. Virgil enjoyed watching things zip by beneath them as the road was clear under them as the travelled, a bit like a glass bottomed boat and you could see the tops of trees, houses and even the ground based motorways. He often wondered what the maglock express ways were like, the newest and fastest trains on the planet that they were currently in the middle of building across Europe. They where said to be faster than a bullet train, but not as fast as the speed of sound us they still had not worked out how to prevent motion related illnesses that were the results of super high speed travel. 

He noticed other Motorcycles pass them and smaller cars, none of them had any wheels and all hovered inches off the ground and the stares of people in the passenger seats or at the select few traffic stops they got, some of them in surprise that what they were riding was considered road worthy, while others were impressed to see something so old going for a spin.

Virgil had only ever been in their father's bi-plane before and had refused a ride in Scott's jet unless it was for a lift back home. If he was going to fly, it would be on his own terms and in his own aircraft he decided so he had been trying to get his pilot’s licence in his spare time. Flying a single engine light aircraft however didn't seem to match the feeling of what it was like hanging into his brother for dear life on the back of the motorbike. In the same way a car or a plane became almost an extension of yourself the more you got in control of the vehicle, the motorbike was like an extension of his brother, one that didn't have much between you, other motorists and certain death. There was a massive thrill in it that he couldn't describe. No wonder John owned one.

Family illness, John always laughed about it as if it was huge joke. Stupidity and the thrill of danger of the unknown was a family trait, something they all shared to various degrees and to an extent both Virgil and John's idea of thrill seeking adventure was pretty tame compared to the rest of the family.

The stop over at Knoxville involved a good old fashioned steak house, although John ordered the only chicken thing on the menu after he saw another customers steak which he said he could still hear it 'moo.' Virgil didn't mind a bit of blood in his steak, but he wouldn't have eaten it as blue as this other customer had. The conversation was pretty animated, though one sides as John just asked about what Virgil was studying, how he was finding it.. all the usual rubbish you do when you have a basic catch up with someone. It was a nice feeling, because rarely Virgil ever had someone take an interest in him or what he was doing with himself and being able to voice his feelings on practically everything felt rather good.

Afterwards they had a tour of the town so Virgil could do all the usual touristy things and take pictures of all the places Virgil's favourite singers and songwriters started out before they started on the final stretch towards Cape Kennedy in Florida.

By the time they reached John's apartment it was almost midnight, and yet Virgil didn't seem to care. Despite the travel he had a pretty good day and had even found time to let himself enjoy everything around him. He needed that inspiration hit and he clearly got it that evening. John wasn't too ceremonious when it came to showing Virgil around the apartment either, he just let him explore it at his own leisure and choose where he wanted to have a sleeping bag laid out for him since there were now two spare rooms in which he could stay.

Virgil saw some magazines on the coffee table, and pushed them around before picking one up to flick through.

“What's with all the Tattoo magazines, John?” he eventually asked once his brother entered the living space, dressed in a baggy top which hid his boxer shorts beneath them.

“Oh those? I've been meaning to get one, but I can't seem to find anything I like.”

“You want one?”

John shrugged. “I've always wanted one.” he headed into the kitchen and there was a distinct click as a kettle was flicked on. “Want anything?”

“Just a coffee.” Virgil called back. In the kitchen he could hear voices and came to the conclusion John was just playing video phone messages that had been left on the machine. There were a few female voices, some male and eventually one he recognised. Then he could hear his brother mutter, “Pete's sakes, Gordon! I haven’t even read the stuff you've sent this morning and you've left sixteen bloody messages asking me about it! Can't you spell check your own homework?”

Virgil found himself smiling, trying not to laugh. Still the same old Gordon, still the same old John.

The magazines had been giving him some ideas however. He had never tried his hand at tattoo design before, usually finding it a wasted art for many talented people who could be doing something pretty amazing with their skills. Now for some reason it seemed really inviting, maybe it had something to do with how much he enjoyed the trip on the motorbike, he didn't really know... but he had the desire to try and do one. He looked up when a coffee was held in front of him and took it gratefully.

“Sorry about that.” John ungracefully flopped on the chair beside him with mug of tea, spilling it a little as he did so. “I guess I won't be sleeping tonight if Gordon's as desperate as he sounds. He shouldn’t leave his homework to last minute and then expect me to find all his mistakes.” he propped his feet up on the coffee table, something he would usually get into trouble for at home.

He craned his head to see what had caught his younger brother's eye. “See something in there you like?”

“I was just thinking I needed something different to try art wise.” Virgil didn't look up from the pages he seemed to be studying with great interest. “I can see why you want one, these space tattoos look really pretty.”

“Yeah, sadly the colours that those ones have have to be re-done every few months, and I don't think I’m willing to go through all that just to prevent the colours mixing together.” Virgil was a little surprised at how much his brother had really thought about it, but then he was fully aware like their parents, there were many sides to John, quite a lot of it went unnoticed because of how much he didn't really talk about himself. Virgil wasn't too much different, keeping a lot of things he did to himself also, but he didn't have the wild streak as bad as his older brother that seemed to have blossomed now that he wasn't living at home. It had been there a long time, little bits of it showed here and there when they spent time together at home and with their other siblings, but this was the first time Virgil was seeing it full in the face, free and unchained from the restrictions of being the responsible child in the family and the one most under their father's scrutiny.

Virgil often wondered what it felt like being the one under the most pressure of being seen as something your not. In away he had a lot more freedom to do what he wanted with himself, if he threw his whole career out the window to live in Venice as an artist no one would bat an eyelid. Maybe that's really what bothered Virgil... no one would mind not matter what he did.

“Hey, did I say something wrong? You look like you've just found a thunderstorm in your coffee.” 

“Hmm?” he looked up and realised his brother looked rather worried about him. “Sorry, I  think I’m just tired.”

“Sure, well, Then I won't keep you.” John seemed a little disappointed, it wasn't often he got to talk to Virgil about something they both had an interest in. They talked very little at all to start with, and John really wanted to try and fix that. Sure, Alan and Gordon both worried the hell out of him most of the time, but at least they openly talked about what was eating them when they felt down in the dumps. Virgil didn't, and was the kind of person to let it sit like a rock in the back of his brain until John had to pry open his own Pandora's box of emotions, something that never worked out well for John afterwards.

Virgil glanced back up as he watched his brother get up and head for his room. Maybe he shouldn't have brushed him off like he had. After all, John was only trying to help.

***

Virgil was woken up by the sound of the video phone in the spare room he was sleeping in. Rentals these days were all wired up to every room in the house to one, something Virgil thought must be for convenience or at the very least, for the annoyance of the people living in it. After a few rings that clearly were going to go unanswered, Virgil sat up in his sleeping bag and picked up the call.

“Virgil? What are you doing at John's place?”

“Gordon? What time of the day do you call this?”

“Uh it's mid afternoon on a Sunday Virgil.”

it took a few minutes for Virgil to register Gordon was calling from home. Being closer to Australia and New Zealand meant they were at least roughly a day ahead of where he was in America.

“I'm just visiting to get away from University.” Virgil admitted.

“That's great, John could really use the sanity of another person.” Gordon joked. “Speaking of which, where is he? I got his email with the corrections to my essay and I was not happy being called out for plagiarism. I didn't. It's just the fact that this particular subject hasn't got any other references to use other than one major source, and it's not like I can go under the sea to conduct research on the subject myself.”

“What's the subject?” 

“The life cycle of a giant squid. Most of it is all speculation and theory anyway, they are just basing all facts on what their smaller cousins are like without really bothering with the fact something so huge could possible have a completely different evolutionary way of life.”

“Who does he say you plagiarised?” 

“Mum apparently.” Gordon looked as if he was bristling with underlying rage. “He said I must have read and used all her notes that she had from years ago, but I wouldn't have a clue how, all of mum's work was locked off in the observatory on the other side of the house and we are forbidden from going in there, So I don't understand why he thinks I have.”

Virgil shrugged. “If he thinks you have, then you have. I wouldn't question it.”

“Ugh, thanks a lot for taking his side Virge.” Gordon rolled his eyes, before hanging up the video phone on his end. Gordon was becoming a bit of a horror since he no longer had his older brothers around to keep him in line. Virgil was beginning to feel sorry for Alan who was stuck there with him without the option of being able to leave whenever he wanted. 

Virgil stripped himself out of his sleeping bag and pulled on a t-shirt and headed for John's room. The door was wide open and John was sitting asleep with his head on his desk with the holographic screen of his computer still flicking away. Gordon's essay was still open on the desktop with hundreds of little red notes all over it. Sometimes he wondered why John bothered losing sleep over helping them at times, Virgil was aware there were moments where it was a completely thankless and unappreciated job. The tiny little room wasn't much different from the mess his real room was back at home, with the exception that at least here you could see the floor. Paperwork was everywhere, from massive pages of text to technical drawings of satellites, rockets and other space designed craft like rovers.

There were also hundreds of photographs, a lot of them of different star systems taken with telescopes and then there were these....

Even though he wasn't living at home, you couldn't take family away from him. Virgil smiled when he saw a photo of all of them that was taken at Alan's ninth birthday party.

John as usual wasn't in it, being the one who took the photo, however just by looking at it and how much fun they had that day it must have meant a lot to him.

Virgil turned off the holoscreen and as he did so a hand shot out and grabbed his wrist. 

“Don't touch my stuff.” John mumbled, still half asleep. Virgil almost burst out laughing, as this was a reaction that was usually in response to Gordon trying to steal John's music CDs back at home.

“Gordo called, you just missed him.”

“Hmm? Oh, sorry Virgil.” John let go and let out a yawn. “What time is it?”

“Time you learned not to sleep at your desk. I can't believe you still do this.”

“And I can't believe you're on my case about it still. What did shark bait want?”

“Mostly to yell at you for pretty much declaring he was plagiarising mum's work.”

“Well he was, just because she never published it doesn't mean he can use it for his own gains.” John stood up and stretched. “How do you feel about a walking tour today? There's some pretty great arcades down along the beaches just west of here.”

“So no biking around today?”

John yawned again. “Heck no, I couldn't drive in a straight line if I tried.” he smiled.

Virgil loitered around the kitchen while his brother cooked, reading the fridge magnets and looking at the photographs that were pinned under them. One read 'I pretended to be normal once, it got boring so I turned back' and under it was a photo that made Virgil chuckle. He made sure John wasn't watching before slipping it into his own wallet. He might be able to do something with it later, his brother won't miss it surely?

Virgil had to admit he felt a little strange having John making him breakfast, as usually it was their littlest brother Alan who was sitting in the kitchen, asking for pointers on how to cook things when he had to spend the day on his own. The thought was pushed aside when he remembered it wasn't Alan who liked pancakes, rather Belgium waffles and that the pancakes were being made specifically for him. Despite being the one who babied the littlest in the family obsessively, John did have a tendency to transfer that overly protective behaviour to his other siblings from time to time whenever he felt they needed it. If he was doing it subconsciously, then clearly Virgil must be showing signs that he needed some sort of comfort or assurance.

He should just give in an relax and let John just do what he does, but he can't find it in himself to do so, even if his brother just needed someone to dote over for a while. The conversations they had with their father about it seemed to spring to mind, that they all should act their ages and that John either had to stop smothering them or he would force him to. It was fine when they were little, but now it had to stop. Virgil never understood why it was ok for him to have feelings about his brothers and not for John. Dad had to have his reasons, whatever they were.

“You're deep in thought this morning.” John said after a while, watching his brother randomly poke at the pancakes placed in front of him.

“Was just thinking I might go down the beach and see if I can drum up some inspiration to draw.” Virgil lied.

“So no arcade then?”

“No, I think it might do me some good to wander around on my own a bit... you know to get my thoughts in order. I don't get the time to stretch my legs back at the university.”

“That's... that's ok.” John's enthusiasm suddenly died. Virgil didn't want to have to disappoint his older sibling, but he also didn't want to fall back into old habits of being treated like a little kid. He watched his brother stand up and grab a small data hub from the bench and bring it to the table. Once activated it showed a map of the surrounding area.

“Take this with you when you go out. It'll stop you getting lost.”

“Thank you John. I appreciate it.”

“It's no problem Virgil.”

The rest of the meal was eaten in silence, Virgil taking care not to show that he was feeling guilty of just brushing his brother off after his offer of hospitality. It was for each other's own good, Virgil for his own independence, and John for whatever it was it was supposed to be good for.

Afterwards, Virgil was tucking his sketch gear into his backpack when John appeared around the door. “Are you sure you don't want company at all Virgil?” he asked.

“Positive. Maybe we can do all that stuff tomorrow?”

“Sure, take care then.”

Virgil didn't even look up to see where John went after that. He picked himself up and headed out the front door and towards the stairwell and didn't pause until he felt the sun on his face outside. He knew after the great afternoon yesterday he was being a bit of a jerk, but no one said he had to spend quality time with anyone while he was down here.

Long after Virgil had left, John had very little to do. He sat at his desk fiddling with a pen trying to work out why his little brother had a sudden change of tune. He was all for having fun the day before, but whatever was eating him up inside must have come back after he had gone to bed last night. Sometimes, Virgil didn't make any sense to him.

It wasn't just that, however, even Gordon and Alan were acting odd when he spoke to them these days. The only person to be remotely civil was Scott and that was because his older brother would rather be spending time with him than being out in the middle of the desert doing drills. He and Scott may not always have got along at the best of times, but at least he wouldn't say no to a game at the arcade.

The video phone started to ring, and John half heartedly answered.

“Hey how's my little 'star man' doing?”

“Morning Scott.” John sat himself upright and tried to look a little more dignified which was hard to do in his over sized shirt he wore as PJ's. “How's Syria?”

“Ridiculously dry.” Scott answered. “Far worse than the summers dad decided to take us on vacation to Australia.”

John found himself smiling. Right now any sort of small talk would cheer him up. Scott couldn't talk about what he was doing with the air force, but at least the general chit chat kept the both of them reasonably sane while they were apart.

“Gordon told me you've got a visitor?”

“If you'd call Virgil a visitor.” John sighed. “We had a lot of fun when I picked him up yesterday and just all of a sudden he just... I don't know... changed on me?” John frowned. “I don't understand, I must have said or done something wrong, but I can't think of anything.”

“Do you think something's bothering him?”

“I didn't think so until this morning. When I invited him here I knew he was overworked from his studies. Maybe that's just it?”

Scott seemed to think about it, his expression ever thoughtful on the screen. “Maybe. I was never good at reading either of you. Unlike Alan and Gordon neither of you wear your emotions on your faces.”

“I take that as a compliment.”

“I shouldn't if I was you.” Scott grinned shaking his head.

“Ah you're just saying that.” John waved it off. “But seriously, something is going on, Not just with Virgil either. Gordon's acting nasty and Alan... he used to visit every weekend last year and suddenly just stopped. He acts like nothing is different, but he doesn't talk about the stars and movies and games like he used to.”

“Are you sure it's not them deciding to grow up a little?” Scott raised an eyebrow. “Eventually they will all outgrow you and I, John. Has to happen sometime.” Scott paused before adding. “I do find it a little strange about Alan though. I remember how much he missed you on his birthday this year and was devastated you had to leave again. He's still little after all.”

“That’s what makes me think something is wrong.”

“Alright John, I'll try and do some investigating of my own. Anyway, I wanted to ask how your last job went?”

“Pretty good, the SS Andromeda was going through it's final checks last time I checked in a few days ago. She's a beauty Scott, the sleekest streamline spaceship they've made to date. Just waiting on who they're going to choose to fly it on it's maiden voyage. Who ever it is going to be is going to really make it into the history books.”

“You sound as if you're hoping that it'll be you going up there.” Scott joked.

“I wish, although I’ve done all the training.” John smiled wistfully. “I'm the youngest they have so I doubt I’d get selected for a solo flight. They'll probably wait till I’m far older.”

Scott laughed. “Can you wait that long to be a space cowboy?”

“Not really.” John felt himself go red with embarrassment. “I've always wanted to reach out and touch them. I know I'd be burned alive if I could, but it's the idea that keeps me going.”

The two of them talked well into lunch time and long into the afternoon. Scott was more than happy to hold on the line just for someone for John to interact with as it seemed like his little brother needed it. He also hoped Virgil eventually came around to spending time with John, Scott did worry about his brother all alone in Florida when he clearly needed the company of his siblings to keep him emotionally in check.

Down the beach, Virgil spent the day staring at a blank page. There was lots of people, lots of beautiful sites around the town and he still couldn't find anything inspiring to put onto paper. He pulled out the picture he nicked off John's fridge that morning and felt a strong pang of guilt about ditching his brother when the guy was only trying to seek out his company. Eventually he found the pencil in his left hand wandering around the page, scribbling aimlessly until he realised he was drawing his older brother the way he had found him that morning, sleeping at his desk. Virgil enjoyed drawing his brothers, usually from photographs as it was impossible to get any of them to sit still long enough to pose, and it never occurred to him that they were all pictures John had taken until now. He wondered why he never had sketched his brother before now as it was something that had never occured for him to do before.

He always found his brothers interesting subjects, each one displaying a particular strength or emotion that came through brilliantly on paper, from Scott's heroism, Gordon's love of action and excitement and Alan's curious nature all provided him with ideal subjects to play with. Looking at his sketch he realised his brother had a whole lot more there he had not explored before.

Virgil flicked to the next page and doodled some more sketches of his brother, one with him as he remembered sitting on the couch, dressed in his ridiculous sleepwear and then another of him in his motorbike gear, one relaxed and dreamlike, the other brimming with a silent sense of confidence in oneself. He was quite pleased with them, and decided he'd been out in the sunshine long enough and decided to head back.

John wasn't there when he walked in, however there was a note on the table addressed to him.

'Gone down to the arcade just to get out of the joint for a bit. Feels like a prison cell you know? Anyway, hope you're feeling up to indian food tonight, going to be bringing some home. - John.'

Prison cell huh? John used to refer the house at home to one when their father was around. In the last year before he was at university, their father seemed to be unimpressed with the way John was turning out as a son. Virgil wasn't sure why. It wasn't as if John had a drug problem or ever asked their father for money. If anything he was the ideal child, always looking out for his brothers and never taking anything for granted and always thinking about other people before himself. He couldn't think of a single occasion where he didn't. If he was feeling like his own personal space was like that then something had to be bothering him. Maybe Virgil had been a bit too harsh on him, or his brother was just over reacting. John did have a tendency to be overly sensitive about things.

Hours past and eventually John returned, unceremoniously dropping the take out he brought on the coffee table.

“Loose to the claw machine huh?” Virgil joked, trying to lighten the mood. He knew his brother was obsessed with those types of skill games, and had gotten to the point where he made them look too easy.

“Nah, I have played them all before. They still havn't got anything new in them. Wasted most of my quarters on the video games down there... they aren't that fun without anyone to play against.” he dug through the bags and pulled out a box with some strange curry-like substance in it. “Spoke to Scott today, Says he's in Syria.”

“How's his Arabic ?” Virgil grinned.

“Terrible as usual but you can't tell him that.” John seemed to finally smile. “Oh I also got some really good news from NASA, figured you'd be the first and only one to hear it!”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah they finally got a launch day and have selected who they are going to fly it!” John sounded excited. He had sat forward and looked really enthusiastic about it. John and anything to do with space was a match made in heaven when it came to seeing his brother really glow.

The video phone rang however this time it was on an audio line only. It had to be dad. He never spoke to John via video link since he left the island. John joked and said it was because he saw him enough on the holidays, but the truth was far more hurtful than that.

“Oh man, just when I finally had something good happen today..” John groaned getting up to answer it in the kitchen, leaving Virgil to enjoy his dinner. Virgil pulled out his sketch book and flicked through the drawings he had done today, hoping that maybe John would like them as much as he did. He opened to another blank page and started to sketch John while he was one the phone.

“Hi father we were just... We? I have Virgil around for the weekend... what? Because I asked him to, I even picked him up myself. No we're not having wild parties, I told you that was my roommates and not me. Uh huh... wait, Alan did what? You're kidding me! Is he alright? I can be there first thing in the morn- oh hang on what? Why? That makes no sense, how is it my fault?”

Virgil lowered his pencil and his gaze held John's for a few minutes, till his brother seemed to regain his composure. Virgil had learned along time ago that while other people struggled to find John a hard person to get along with, he was really quick to keep his emotions in check - otherwise he was in danger of exposing how vulnerable he was to the world. He still in a way, wore his heart on his sleeves like everyone else in the family, just far better at hiding it.

Virgil couldn't help get the feeling something horrible had been said as all the joyous outward display his brother had was gone.

“I see. Well I can't really... oh I could have not shown him how to in the first place? That's a bit rich. No I'm sorry, I didn't mean... alright I'll tell Virgil. That's fine. Are you going to tell Scott? Well why not? Oh because he'd be on my side, I see, fair enough we don't want any of that do we dad? Alright, I'll tell him. See you.” John hung up the phone and ran his hands over his face and through his hair.

“What's wrong?” Virgil put his book down and started to stand up.

“Dad's sending his friend around in the private jet to take you home and I have to make sure your at the airfield first thing tomorrow.” John looked as if he was trying to find the words for the next part of what he needed to tell him but couldn't bring himself to do so.

“John, you're still hiding something.” Virgil took a few steps closer to his brother, to make sure he couldn't break eye contact. He knew once he did, he wouldm't get anything more out of John. It was something Gordon did too, with the exception that Gordon would come clean sooner or later and not bottle it till he couldn't take it anymore.

His brother sighed. “Once you go, I'm not allowed to talk to you again.”

“Pfft, like that's ever going to happen, you keep me sane.”

“He'll figure a way to, you know what dad's like. He only throws money around when he's really mad. Said I'm the worst son in the world and a bad influence.”

“Ok now I know you're lying to me John, you're extremely harmless. Gordon's more of a problem than you are, that kid sneaks off to go night clubbing whatever chance he gets when he's off the island and supposed to be spending time with me.”

Vigil grabbed his brother by the arms. “Tell me what's going on?”

“Alan fell off the roof of the house. He's got a broken arm and a shattered collarbone, but otherwise fine. Dad says it's my fault for showing him how to get up there in the first place.”

Virgil sighed, he knew it had to have something to do with the youngest Tracy. Falling off the roof of the house? It wasn't secret Alan and John both used to sit up there at night to watch the stars. The spot they usually chose was above Virgil's bedroom as it wasn't obstructed by light pollution from the lights in the backyard. Alan still crawled up there some nights and talked to John on the phone so they could still talk about them and compare the difference between the northern and southern hemisphere.  Alan must have been getting ready to call up tonight if he was trying to get up there.

“John, that's not your fault, that's Alan's for being so stupid.”

“I'm the irresponsible one who showed him how to get up there Virgil.”

Ok clearly this wasn't going to go anywhere... time to change the topic slightly, Virgil decided. “Ok so why am I being haled home and not you? You ALWAYS go home as soon as you can to sit by his side till he gets better!” Virgil tried to remind him that was his brother's job, being there for their silly younger siblings.

“Father said no, his word is final. He'd probably go all crazy on me if I tried. He does own a shotgun Virgil and he has threatened to use it before.”

“Surely he wouldn't, would he?” Virgil had to think for a minute. Their father would, come to think of it. He had a few times on Scott and on Gordon as a threat to try and get them back in line from misbehaving once. He remembered the hole in the roof and how embarrassed their father was afterwards for being such an idiot. It made you realise how hard it was trying to keep five sons in line from time to time for the man. If pathetic harmless old John was as disappointing as their father believed then yeah he would not put it past him. Sure their father was a loving and gentle man, but it didn't mean he couldn't get angry and be wrong a lot of the time too.

Virgil couldn't think of what else to say, so he just hugged his brother, hoping that at the very least it would help him feel better. It didn't but John acted as if it had the rest of the evening, trying hard not to think about not being allowed to be there for Alan.

Eventually Virgil found himself drawing again, his older brother in a fitful sleep on the couch. John didn't even bring up what he was so excited about at NASA anymore the rest of his time awake, which Virgil was sort of hoping he would. The only mention of it was John saying he would have had to take Virgil back home a day earlier, but it doesn't matter anymore because he can't stay anyway.

It was if a part of his brother had just been taken away and locked behind a huge steel door.  This wasn't the weekend he had expected, Virgil realised that John might have had tons of fun things planned and none of them were ever going to happen.

He tried thinking about how fast his brother's emotions changed, and sketched them out on paper. When all laid out in front of him like that he could see John was quite a highly animated person who had a range of emotions that very few other people possessed within a space of an hour. They were clearly fleeting each and every one, but they were there all the same. Further back in the book he could find resemblances here and there to sketches he had of Gordon, full of confidence and cockiness and stupidity, Alan's curiosity and nativity, even traces of Scott's seriousness and calm, however they were all tinted with a shy brush.

It was funny the little things you think about as an artist, he considered. Until you sit down and really study a person you don't realise how fascinating and unique they are.

He love how his brothers all made very strange subjects at times, even bizarre in the case of Scott as he noticed things about the eldest Tracy he would more than happy burn the pages of the book if was asked about them. His eyes wandered back to the tattoo magazines and he spotted a photograph of a bright yellow space craft that looked rather streamlined and had four big rocket engines attached to it's design. Virgil wondered if that was the ship John had been working on at NASA. He wouldn't mind if he borrowed the picture to draw too?

Their father was being unfair. Virgil remembered as a kid  they had all climbed on the roof at one point or another with John, himself to paint the view, Scott to smoke dad's cigars where he couldn't see him and Gordon to fire a bottle rocket or two that managed to smash a window on the odd occasion. None of the mischief they got up to up there was John's fault, but he got into trouble for it every time.

It was never the intention for his brothers to join him there either, in a house with four other siblings it was inevitable that it sort of just happened. You can't get away from them no matter how much you tried.

Personal space, in that kind of situation was limited and no matter what John did, he never seemed to get any of it. It was their fault now that he didn't like it as much as he probably should have now he was doing his own thing.

Alan's accident had been bothering Virgil too. The kid was going to be wondering why no one had told his older brother yet as Alan liked waking up and having John there to spoil him when he ended up confined to the house because of something happening or another... usually because of Gordon's pranks backfiring and injuring him in some way. In that regard John was more of a mother hen than Scott was to the rest of them as a whole, being the only sibling to willingly adopt the youngest in the family as Virgil had so bluntly put it himself once – because no one else would. But then again, you couldn't expect a five and a six year old to understand that it's not the baby's fault they no longer have a mother either. He remembered Scott and Gordon fighting a lot and having shout-offs at John who never fought them back. Virgil used to admire him for it, still did. He knew he would never understand why John liked the baby in the family back then, but maybe it had something to do with the fact everyone else hated him at the time? It was possible. Same could have been said that he didn't think it was fair Alan didn't get to have a mum and John, who spent a lot more time with her than anyone else thought he shouldn't miss out on getting to know her even if she was gone. Whatever the case, Virgil knew there was a deep ingrained sense of responsibility there for his littlest brother you couldn't budge. Virgil had something like it with Gordon, but he knew it would never be as tight as theirs.

Telling him he can't do what he has always done was quite possibly the same as telling John to shoot himself. THAT annoyed Virgil. If it was Gordon, Virgil would have been arguing the matter till his father caved in and just let him be a brother. He didn't understand why John wouldn't.... unless he was really trying to impress the old man and was afraid of disappointing him. It was only natural, Scott did, so why shouldn't John? Virgil knew himself and Gordon only ever cared about impressing the older two as their father seemed pretty admit that they were the examples to live up to... or at the very least, Scott was.

As Virgil drew, his thoughts seemed to dictate the sketches of his sibling. It was funny, despite the fact he looked more like their father and Scott, Virgil never really had much in common with them. He was far calmer and far stronger, got hot headed and irrational far less than they did, and had more sympathy for other people and their opinions and a lot more respect for them too. He couldn't think of where he learned all that from, as he didn't spend that much time around their mother when she was alive, but trailing behind Scott trying to be better than him, which was all things considered a wasted effort.

He smiled. There was times when he had woken up in the morning to find new sketch books and pencils at the end of his bed with little silly notes attached to them, asking for some picture or another. They were not easy things to draw either, sometimes they were asked to be done in a particular style. He often wondered where the pictures had ended up and only stopped when he saw them all hung up in frames on John's bedroom wall, just above the bed. It was funny, Virgil was slightly shy and hid his talent from his brothers and somehow John had subtly helped encourage him to improve without him noticing.

It made Virgil less embarrassed about being the only artist in the family and be proud that someone liked his work.

That might have been why he never bothered painting from photos with John in them. After all who would want pictures of themselves to hang on their walls when they couldn't even look at themselves in a mirror? That was another weird mystery Virgil had solved and promised to keep to himself.

Looking at his sketches, he grinned. Maybe it was time to do something about that.

Virgil awoke to the smell of french toast and cinnamon and realised he was no longer where he had fallen asleep on the floor, was instead tucked under a warm blanket on the couch.The plate of food was on the coffee table which was now free from magazines with a  glass of apple juice sitting beside his drawing utensils.

He sighed. His brother had gone into over bearing sibling mode, but he couldn't be mad at him for that. It wasn't as if he didn't have anyone else to do it too.

“Morning Van Gogh.” 

Virgil looked up to see John leaning over the back of the couch. “Kyrano rang and said he's just landed at the nearby airfield. I guess dad wants you out of here pretty quick.” John seemed to shake his head. “I was hoping for some time to see a film before you had to go but even that's not going to be possible.”

“Well if we jumped on your bike we could skip the state?”

“You've never been on the end of Kyrano's tracking abilities have you? There's a reason he's dad's butler... he's like a terrier if you try to avoid him.” he smiled slightly under his tired eyes. “Think of dad's other friend's one Parker. Both of them are as bad as each other believe me.”

“This sucks.”

“Tell me about it.”

“No I mean, it really does suck, you should be going instead of me.”

“Best not to make the whole thing worse than it is Virgil. Sometimes you have to accept stuff that won't change, even if it's in the face of a stubborn bull-headed fool.”

“I've never heard you call dad that before.”

“You've never heard Scott's words on the matter. He's a lot less kind about it.”

“You mean even he has problems with dad?”

“You better believe it. I've seen them argue before. Scotty has a temper that's dangerous off a leash.”

“So do you John.”

His brother snorted. “I don't get that bad.”

“I've seen you beat Gordo up a few times. It's pretty bad.”

“His own fault. I hate being the butt of all his pranks.” he ruffled Vigil's hair. “Eat up so we can walk over. At least I can't get into trouble for seeing you off. Might be the last chance I get if dad has his way after this.”

The walk to the airfield was pretty sombre, Virgil noticed his brother was doing everything he could not to think about not being able to go home. He never heard John talk so much about the most trivial things before. It wasn't normal, his brother wasn't good at small talk even in the best case scenario and was much more inclined to do all the listening when everyone else had things more interesting to say. When they reached the jet Kyrano pulled John aside and had a little talk with him before they had to leave the tarmac and head home. Virgil wished he was in on what had been said, Kyrano rather liked John as as far as he was concerned, the blonde couldn't do any wrong and didn't understand why Jeff was so harsh on the boy. Maybe the fact that his brother was staying behind made him more concerned than usual as Kyrano even mentioned that it was strange that he wasn't jumping in the plane too with Alan the way he was. Vigil told him to ask their father as he didn't really understand either.

Walking into the house back on the island wasn't a picnic either. When Alan saw him he sat up on the living room chairs, arm in a sling and all full of excitement that his father had sent for someone to keep him company. Just what Virgil wanted to face, the littlest Tracy, expecting to see his best pal walking through the living room doors.

“Hey Virgil!” Alan shouted, as if he had not had been remotely hurt at all from his fall that night. “Dad said you were staying with John and said you were coming home today just to see me!”  He seemed to look past both Virgil and Kyrano for a minute or two. “Where's John? Thought he'd come with you?'

“I'm sorry to be the be a bit of a disappointment Alan, I didn't expect to come home on my own.” Virgil tried not to look at his little brother, he couldn't bare to see the disappointment cross his face.

Kyrano spoke. “He said he couldn't come just yet, he had a few things to tie up first.” Virgil looked at him in shock as if Kyrano had never told a lie so honestly believable before.  “He won't disappoint you master Alan I'm sure.”

Virgil leaned towards him and whispered, “You got any evidence to back up your little lie, I suggest you use it now before Alan asks any questions.”

“Check your book.” Kyrano mumbled back with a sly smile.

“Are we going to play this silly game now?” Virgil hissed.

Kyrano raised an eyebrow and Virgil rolled his eyes. “Fine.” he dropped his backpack and started to rummage for his sketchbook. He opened the book and shook it till a slip of paper fell out. Alan was faster than Virgil to pick it up.

“Have Alan watch the rocket launch tomorrow.” Alan flipped the paper around to see if there was more, but there wasn't.

“Great, more fun and games. Honestly John, why can you never be straightforward with-” Virgil hesitated. “Hey Alan, do they post anything up about the NASA rockets on the internet?”

“Do they ever!” Alan had forgotten whatever it was that had made him upset about John not being there. Clearly things to do with space where far more important to the kid than his own family. He thought for a moment, “The only rocket that's scheduled to launch tomorrow is a test one. Why would John want me to watch that? Dad says those launches are dangerous and that I'm banned from them unless I'm with an adult.”

“Huh? Since when? I thought all launches were dangerous.” Virgil frowned. He tapped a button on the underside of the coffee table and brought up a holoscreen and keyboard. “Do you know what the rocket is called?”

“It's the SS Andromeda.” Alan smiled. “I didn't know you were into spaceships Virgil!”

“Not usually, no.” Virgil could honestly think of much better machines to occupy his spare time working on than space rockets and satellites. He typed the name of the craft in the search engine and stood back in surprise at the three-dimensional image of the space ship that came up on screen. It was streamlined and had four chunky engines at the lower end. he recognised it from the photo he swiped from John's coffee table. “Says here it's a three stage experimental solo craft. What's so special about that?”

“Three stage craft? Oh that, that's what they used to call the old space shuttles that Neil Armstrong used to set foot on the moon. They don't make many of them anymore unless they are to test some sort of new fancy equipment. Even dad never got to fly in one of those things.” Alan seemed to rattle off information as if he had memorised it by heart. Virgil wasn't going to question it, his little brother was obsessed with the things to the point he was sure he knew everything right down to the company that manufactured the engines.Then he frowned. “Why would John tell me to watch a spacecraft that might get blown to bits? Experimental crafts rarely ever stay intact the entire journey.”

Virgil found a link to the ships astronaut and opened it. “Maybe he helped build it or...” Virgil had to take a step back from the holographic screen. “He's going to fly it.” the news John didn't manage to tell him the night before he left was now staring him in the face. “Well I'll be a son of a monkey...”

“Don't let dad hear you say that.” Alan warned. “He's floating around in his office you know.”

Virgil could feel Alan tugging his shirt with his good hand. “John was going to tell me about this before dad rang.” Virgil admitted. “He never got to.”

“Why would he want to be in something so dangerous? Why couldn't he wait till a proper space launch came up?”

“I don't think it works like that Alan. I think you take whatever you can get.” he gave Alan a reassuring smile. “That's what he's always wanted though, isn't it? To be up amongst the stars. Maybe this is his only chance.”

“I don't want him to go Virgil.”

Virgil squatted down to Alan's small height. His ten year old brother looked as if his world was going to crash around him, he couldn't have that.

“He was very excited about it. I think that maybe him asking me to make sure you're watching was because he wanted you to be excited too.” Virgil gave his little brother a reassuring smile. “He always thinks of you when he does things, he only wants you to be proud of having a big brother who gets to do something he's always dreamed of.” it was true, Virgil could never make that up in a million years. “And don't listen to dad ok? John wanted to be here and would have been happy to put this whole space thing aside just to see you. If this is the only way he gets to cheer you up, he's going to take it.”

Alan gave Virgil a hug and gave him a surprise. Virgil was also more than happy to return it.

The launch the next day was interesting. Alan sat curled up next to Virgil as he doodled more in his sketchbook, watching eagerly but at the same time, full of nerves and worry. He couldn't fault the littlest one for it, he was just as concerned, two days ago might have been the last time he'd see his sibling who was obsessed about touching the stars.

“Alan, why are you watching a experimental launch? I strictly told you those things are not for children your age. If you want to see a rocket launch you should wait till the launch an official shuttle to the International Space Station.”

Alan didn't move, so Virgil did so for him and looked up at their father who didn't look impressed.

“I'm also watching it father, so it's alright.”

Jeff's eyes narrowed. “No it isn't Alan's still too young to watch some poor kid risk their life on the off chance that this is as close to being a real astronaut as it gets.”

“Even if it's the youngest astronaut in history?” Virgil replied. “The pilot in question is nineteen.”

“Who'd be that big of a fool to let their own son throw their life away?”

“I wouldn't exactly say 'let' dad. More like 'should have been a little more supportive in them growing up.'” Virgil grunted.

“Ok Virgil I can see you're mad about the whole thing with John, but it's for your own good. He is a bad influence.”

“Not as bad as Gordon when he's decided to sneak into a night club underage.” this got some horrified looks from Jeff. “It's amazing the stuff we get up to when all you do is pick on one person for being a bad hat when they have nothing to do with everyone else's behaviour.”

“Why are you insisting talking back to me Virgil?” Jeff sighed. He hated having arguments with his third oldest son, mostly because he was made to feel guilty about them afterwards. Virgil had a tendency to make his father think about his actions and regret them later.

“Because it's true.” Virgil shrugged. “You so instant that us being trouble makers is all John's fault for being the one who took over as much as he could when mum died. You've resented him for it ever since. Did you ever think that maybe it was Scott that was the bad example instead? He was the one who had wild parties, smoked until he was coughing up his lungs and got me so drunk I couldn't find my own feet for three days. You're so obsessed with finding a fault in the one person who tried to do everything to please you, you fail to see something right under your own nose.”

Alan nudged his brother. “SHH! I can't hear what they are saying. They are talking to the pilot about some sort of worse case scenario. If anything goes wrong, I'd like to know why I don't have a brother anymore.”

Jeff really put on a stern face this time. “What are you on about Alan?”

“The astronaut is one of your sons, Mr. Tracy.” Kyrano replied, entering the room with a tray of lemonade.

“Can't be. I know exactly where they all are.”

“Not everyone Mr. Tracy, sir. You should pay more attention to your boys, if you don't mind me saying so. My daughter even thinks your a bit of a hard nut at times, but I think you'll be surprised by them yet. After all, they all have you tenacity for danger.”

Alan was getting frustrated and turned up the volume on the Television. The communication between Houston and the astronaut squeezed into the tense atmosphere.

“Roger that Huston, I hope that that's not going to be the case. She's a beautiful machine and I am glad to have helped put some elbow grease into her myself, design wise. Andromeda won't be a failure I assure you.”

“We are only really worried about the second lot of separation jets Tracy. If they don't fire as planed you'll either be stranded in space in danger of crashing down with an entire tank full of explosive fuel or they'll blow you to pieces in the abyss.”

“I'm sure they'll do just fine, Huston. I have a good feeling about this. For once, Luck is on my side.”

“Said the man about to die. Look Tracy we are not going to take any chances on re-entry, that understood?”

“Clear as crystal, that's assuming I get that far past the first stage. You're worrying too far ahead again guys.”

“Sometimes your attitude worries us John. You're too laid back about this.”

“What's the worst that could happen? No seriously guys, I think this will be fine. I don't think the stars are going to go out on this candle just yet.”

Jeff listened to the banter as the pre-launch checks began full swing and his face started to pale.

“How? I mean... I honestly thought-”

“That he was a failure? You know he'll die trying to prove you wrong one of these days and you'll wish you paid attention more.” Virgil growled. He had been sketching the rocket now for a little while. Even he couldn't take his mind off the dangers that could happen to his older brother and was trying to channel it into something constructive. 

Virgil gave Jeff a sideways stare. “You need to fix something dad. Not Just for me, but for Alan and everyone else. You owe John an apology.” he grinned. “And it has to be a good one.”

“Virgil!” Alan grabbed his arm, “They're going to launch it!”

Virgil let himself smile. “You know my lecturer for Industrial design saw my art and asked me to enter in the University-wide art show... until now I didn't have any stroke of inspiration... until I spent sometime in Florida.” he said absently, hoping his father would take the hint. “Tickets cost twenty dollars a head, and I think I'd rather someone be there to see it.” Sublty wasn't something Virgil was good at, but at least his father would get the message.

 

***

Space, all things considered, would be far more interesting if he could actually see it, John had decided. Andromeda was fitted with a huge array of holoscreens, read outs and more fancy bits and bobs that you could poke a stick at however it lacked the most vital thing in the whole universe – a view. Spending at least a month above the earth got boring without any reward.

What was the point being in a space ship when you couldn't see outside the damn thing? Fine, the ship wasn't predicted to leave earth at all and crash and burnout long before leaving the atmosphere, but so far everything had gone to plan and he was no longer touching the ozone layer.

“This is Huston calling Andromeda, how's the weather up there?”

“No idea, but the separations of the two lots of thruster engines have worked beautifully. Give my thanks to the engineer and any gods that look after astro-scientists.”

“Don't let it go to your head, you still have to land this baby Tracy.”

“I know, don't keep reminding me. Can't start to think about that until the fuel in these engines burn out and we plummet back to orbit.” he sighed. It was going to be a long few hours before he could do anything up there. “Can I make a suggestion Huston?”

“Anything you want Tracy. You usually do.”

“Next time you intend to send me on a suicide run, could you at least have a window installed? The most prettiest view in my life is potentially outside of this thing and I'd prefer to be looking at that as my dying wish if you intend to kill me.”

“Very funny Tracy.”

“I wasn't joking.”

“Speaking of which, we have a visitor here.”

“Oh god please don't be some folk singer who wants to sing me renditions of Paul McCartney's greatest hits. I'd rather wait till I've died falling back to earth first.”

“It's ex- NASA astronaut Jeff Tracy. Are you both related or something?”

“You mean he's never told anyone?” that was the voice of Jeff, sounding extremely surprised that John had not mentioned they were father and son.

“Why would I dad? I can't do anything on my own without yours, mum's or Scott's shadow hanging over me.” John found himself wishing that the engines had exploded and he wasn't having to listen to the only communications he had to the planet. “What's the problem? Can't I have a moment in my life that I can finally be the star of the story? Or is that too much to ask?”

“I wanted to congratulate you son, and apologise.” Jeff's voice seemed to waver. “I know I've been overly harsh over the years, and ignorant of the one thing that had been in front of me the whole time that I should be proud of. Can you forgive me?”

John really wanted to say no. In his tiny little space shuttle he wanted to scream 'NO! NOT THIS TIME NOT EVER!' at the top of his lungs. What was the point? There was hundreds of scientists down there back at Huston listing to this entire conversation because they were only concerned about the life expectancy of their only astronaut who is about to plummet back to earth in a few hours. There where days he honestly wished it was his father that went missing all those years ago and not his mother, but you can't change the hands of fate. He knew his old man tried, but John just wasn't the boy he wanted him to be. He would always be his mother's son, no matter how you looked at it. Sure he and his father had similar passions, but both for entirely different reasons and that was as far as it went.

“I guess so.”

Relief seemed to fill his father's voice. “When you touch down again, Virgil wants you to see something at the university.”

“Why can't you go?” John sounded suspicious. That would be just like his father, getting him to forgive him and then dump something on him that he was asked to do. Why couldn't his father go and encourage his younger brother himself? He had legs and a damn private jet, it's not like he couldn't get there.

“Because he asked for you and not me.” Jeff's voice seemed to have a strange perkiness to it. “Specifically asked too. You can't argue with Virgil when he gets a bee in his bonnet like that.”

“Anything for Virgil dad.”

“Oh and John?”

“Yeah?”

“The boys down here have informed me that they still have the old tradition of serenading the current astronaut still floating around...”

“Dad, for the love of- you're not going to sing are you?”

“Heck no, that's your brother's area of expertise. No, Alan had a suggestion of his own in which I think you might be a lot more happier with.”

He could hear sniggering from other memebers of the Huston control. Oh great, just want he wanted, to be publicly humiliated when he was millions of miles away from the planet.

Within minutes the whole commuincations channel was filled with music. John sat back in the pilot seat of the Andromeda and smiled. Not only had Alan proved that John had a taste in music that was as old as their father, but one that was as strange as he was as a person. The lyrics for 'Landed' hummed and dances through the relay.

“Thanks a million kid.”

 

***

“Ok, so what am I hear for?” John said walking down the halls of the university of Colorado. He had been in space for three months, had celebrated his twentith birthday in solitude and had only touched down on the planet for four hours before Jeff was quick to whisk him away up state for his brother Virgil's thing – whatever it was. His littlest brother Alan was waiting out front of the building and was so excited to see him he almost walked around the halls with his brother glued to his pants leg. Alan was tugging him around the place, as if he was trying to shepherd his older brother like a stray sheep.

“You'll see. You're going to be so impressed!” Alan chirped.

He lead his older sibling into the gym that had been divided up into a huge art space. There was sculptures, paintings and even installations.

“Wow.” John breathed. This was something that was completely alien to him. Virgil's world of mechanics he could just about understand, but the world of arts in which Virgil truly flourished was something he only ever touched the surface of.

“This way!” Alan dragged his brother along. John didn't even get to glance at any of the pieces, let alone admire the work that had gone into them. There was so many people in the Gymnasium, it made the space feel closed off and small. Enochlophobia was something was very real to John, and right now he was starting to feel sick in the pit of his stomach. That's why he preferred space and the small company of his brothers or work mates.. he couldn't handle large crowds of this scale.

“Alan, I think I'd like to go back outside and wait till there's less people.”

“No you can't 'cause you need to see this now!” his little brother insisted. Alan, like Scott was utterly fearless. There was nothing that could terrify the kid other than maybe loosing his brothers. 

“Really, Alan, I seriously think we should-” he paused when Alan finally stopped hearding him around. His little brother had stopped infornt of some huge space paintings and sketches.

“SEE! Virgil said you'd be impressed!”

The pictures were beautiful. John wouldn't have been able to find any words to descibe them if he could. Unfortuntley some of the subject matter was beginning to make him have a panic attack that was partly due to the crowd, but most because of the eisoptrophobia he had which was far worse.

Being brought up on an island as a child had alot of advantages, but there were tons of downsides as well.... also his choice for work when he left to study abroard had not helped things. 

Virgil, had chosen him as his subject matter.

John couldn't stand seeing himself staring back at him. Sure it wasn't the usual case of spectrophobia, but John really hated how he looked so much it terrified him to think that's how others saw him too. The only saving grace was that their father didn't like to have reflective surfaces other than windows in the house because they looked filthy. John always covered the mirror in the bathroom and avoided Gordon's room like the plague as Gordon was rather unashamedly obsessed with his appearance. It wasn't really his fault, but the fact their father was so hurt by the loss of Lucille, their mother, that John knew his father held some resentment to him looking like her. John really loved his mother but just couldn't bring himself to disappoint his dad either, so eventually it got to the point where he couldn't even bring himself to accept it too.

“You like them?” Virgil's had comfortingly squeezed his brother's arm when he walked over. He knew this would be a very hard thing to get his brother to do. “I figure it's about time I showed you how much you mean to me as a brother and time you accepted yourself for who you are.”

“I could kill you Virgil.” John managed to strangle out, his whole body shaking.

“I take that as a compliment.” Virgil chuckled. “Scott and Gordon are around here somewhere too. Both of them have a bet going.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah they both have money on if you're going to murder me or faint on the spot.” Virgil couldn't help himself and laughed.

John clicked his jaw, something he did when under alot of stress. “I hate you all.”

“No you don't. You love us to death.”

John took a deep breath. “How did you come up with the title of the collection?”

“Scott's idea. You are his little 'Star man'.”

“Figures.” John found that he was starting to calm down a bit. Focusing on Virgil's artistic talent was very soothing, no matter what the subject maybe. “You don't need me to tell you what I think do you?”

“No.” Virgil shook his head. “When it comes to art, I know exactly the words you'd use without even uttering them.” he had a big smile across his face.

“Good.” John hugged his brother. “Can I have you do that one of the spaceship for me as a tattoo design?”

“Anything for you, Space cowboy.”

“Thanks. Oh and Virgil?”

“Yeah?”

“I'd like my photographs back please.”


End file.
